It's Been A While
Hi strangers! My favorite month just ended and I feel like the internet deserves an update on my whereabouts.
I'm now 34. My birthday went really well. I hung out with two of my partners and went to Olive Garden (RIP) the day before my birthday, and I went to see Tron: Ares on my birthday with another of my partners.
Speaking of said partners, I have a new third as of August. He's wonderful and treats me like a gentleman and I loved him immediately. He and my other partners get along and it's just one big happy family.
Unfortunately in my job life I have not been so lucky. I've been under a lot of stress, and it led to me being hospitalized at the beginning of the month. I've been in an intensive therapy program referred to as a partial hospitalization program or PHP. I just finished on Thursday and I've learned so much, including about myself. I'm very glad I went through this program, even if the events that led me there were very hard to deal with.
During my time in the PHP I realized my use of weed had become a big problem for me. I am now in a substance abuse program to help deal with my problem, and I have been away from weed for 13 days now. I do believe the drug has some phenomenal health benefits when used properly; my mother has had a very good experience with using it for her fibromyalgia and lupus pain for example. But the way I was using it was going too far. I was using it to avoid my feelings and my reality, and that wasn't healthy. I'm trying to learn to approach it in a healthy and respectful way, and I accept that if I can't do that then I can't return to using it. (I think if I do eventually return to using it, taking a good long break will be beneficial anyway, so I have no negative thoughts about this journey outside of my withdrawal symptoms[1].)
I've been maintaining my websites and using a NextCloud server for some personal use. It's been a learning experience but I love learning! :3
I'm hoping to get a job at a local (chain) craft store soon that will help my anxiety and fear about money, and hopefully be a lot less stressful. If you want to and have some extra money, you can help me out in the meantime, but I understand (especially this month) that funds are tight for everyone.
That's all I've got for you. It's been a wile ride but I'm still in the saddle. Let's keep on keepin' on.
[1] Weed is not chemically addictive, but it can be psychologically addictive, and I am experiencing things like increased irritability and decreased appetite, the lack of things I would experience with the drug.